HAVE FAITH

ive been dying to create a new post, i missed blogging so much... been keeping this draft for so long because everytime i start to write i cant finnish it. i have no more time to spend hours to write long entries, so i just usually write while taking calls.... while on hold with the airlines or late afternoon when there's enough avail time. ive missed so much things, i dont know what's happening but things are getting out of control. i know that you had enough of my complaints and even me, i had enough of my self-absorbed drama! but i just cant help myself not to vent out when my soul is bleeding... im emotionally, physically, spiritually and mentally wounded! im exagerating! i know!

whew! 2 more months to go and the sem is finally over... i cant believe that i did this to myself. i cant breathe! i missed my old life. im dog-tired everyday! really really tired! i dont wanna start enumerating my routine again and how it sucks! lets just say im in this battle of confusion of a 20-something stage. i dont know. sometimes life isnt turning out as we planned or its turning out too much as we planned, but do i really still want this? whatever. ive made too many major decisions in my life, im not afraid to make another one and go for another change but what im afraid of is the timing of the decision im about to make. but im not sure yet, im still tyring to see my options for now. im trying to find another one good reason to stay and suffer like hell! (kidding!)

i really want to take a long long break! there are times that i just want to quit with my job and school. often times, i find my self dreaming of the day waking up at home with my family and just spend the rest of the day at home watching TV, sleep. eat...

---- i wrote those things above 2 weeks ago, some things had change. i said that im trying to find another one good reason to stay and luckily i found one!
-FAITH- GOD is so amazing! everytime im almost there ready to give up, He'll always make a way for me to realize that He's just there ready to help me out when the going gets tough! all i need is FAITH in Him and FAITH in myself. FAITH! that's what keeps me going during the rainy days. He'll always make a way to remind me, its either through the books i read or through the people around me or sometimes, it will just come up through my meditations. Its funny how God reminded me this time. One afternoon, i decided not to go to class because i was really really tired and im not prepared for my class (in short, ga tuon2 na kog absent! joke!). I just want to take time for myself, so i said il go home and sleep early. on my way home i decided to stop by a grocery store and buy some things, while crossing the street i noticed that there's this store which sells pirated DVD's (sorry, i know this is prohibited) so i decided to look around and i ended up buying a copy of a TV series called Prison Break. (daghan kaau kog drama noh, palit lng diay 2g prison break! and the next lines you'll read is about prison break na). Anyway, im done with the 2 seasons and the show amazed me and im excited for the 3rd season! Aside from gluing your butt to the couch and your eyes to the screen, and aside from the HOTNESS of Michael Scofield (Wentworth Miller), the show actually exhibits the unconditional love of michael for his brother, of all the movies ive seen and the shows ive watched... this is the only show that portrays so much love of a man to his brother! swear! as in to the extreme! and again, this show made me realize the value of FAITH, coz in the show everytime it comes to a point when its almost a dead end, his brother would always remind him to just have a little FAITH... since they were young that's what they always say to each other "HAVE FAITH." By the way his brother is in a death row and will be executed for a crime he did not commit and he will do anything to save his brother's life. Anyway, most of you have probably seen the show but for those who havent seen it yet, well you MUST go to your nearest video shops, and grab a copy of this TV Series!

So, yeah talking about FAITH, another thing that reminded me about this is the film that was showed to us by one of our profs entitled "THE SECRET", the book is actually more popular, they have it in national bookstore. I havent read the book yet but someday il buy a copy because it was really convincing and inspiring. i saw this book after da vinci code came out, it was one of the books that always goes with the other books with the same genre as the 'da vinci code' like 'the last supper'; 'the hiram'; 'the holy grail'...... so i thought it has something to do with the controversy about religion. but when i saw the film, it was actually about the power of believing in what you want. The 'secret' there is actually ---- LAWS OF ATTRACTION----- if you want something, and if you keep on thinking that you will get that something, it actually releases a positive energy which attracts that something to you! its amazing how it works because all you have to do is BELIEVE, it was even stated that you just have to ask for it and believe that you will get it and the universe will take care of the rest, it will transform according to your needs in order to achive your heart's desires! i remembered PAULO COELHO when he said in his work 'THE ALCHEMIST' ---- When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it-------- isnt that amazing? So here i am, once again very much inspired and holding on really tight, trying to keep my FAITH coz i know il eventually reach my final destination someday! =)